The Uh-Oh Life

With defiance in her eyes and a sly smirk, she vehemently threw it all to the ground. Every small and large morsel was carelessly tossed to the floor below. Some fistfuls were launched with unexpected accuracy against the refrigerator and cupboards. Intervening is always a calculated risk, as some battles are merely not worth the self-sacrifice. So, from a safe distance and with deep exhaustion, we wait until the almost two-year-old has made her point: She is done!

Then it comes…once every granule has been satisfactorily purged from her tray and every dish and cup has been launched to the abyss below, she looks up with steadfastness and adorably says, “Uh-oh.”

If you have ever parented a toddler, I know you’re familiar with this scenario. Mealtime with a toddler is a full-time, stressful, and underpaid job.

While I do not appreciate or even like the “throwing food” stage we are in, I realize that she is in a developmental stage where the removal of unwanted objects tends to be communicated through action and force. For me, the bigger storyline of concern is her verbal follow-up of “Uh-oh.”

No! None of this scene is “Uh-oh.” That cute phrase is reserved for accidents or unintentional occurrences.
She is running and trips = Uh-oh.
She reaches for something and accidentally knocks something over = Uh-oh.
Her blanket falls from the stroller when she shifts = Uh-oh.

A full-on blitz of food projected across my kitchen = NOT Uh-oh. Nope, this is a “fault.” Choices, developmental or not, that cannot be haphazardly dismissed with a simple, “Uh-oh.”

I swear, as we raise children, we raise ourselves. Our children become mirrors and offer perfect parallels to our own lives. While I do not purposefully propel food across my kitchen, I have undoubtedly used the phrase “Uh-oh” in situations where it did not apply. I have been at fault because of my choices and instead of embracing the truth, I have dismissed it with the excuse, “Uh-oh.”

I have blamed forgetfulness on busyness.
I have skirted around responsibilities and blamed forgetfulness.
I have been lazy and blamed it on exhaustion.
I have been distant in relationships and blamed it on the other person involved.
I have chosen anxious thoughts and dismissed the option of peace on the fact that “everyone” has anxiety.
I have been bitter too long and have labeled it acceptable because I am hurt.

I have made choices to behave erratically and without concern for the one(s) who are left scrubbing up the mess. And while I may not vocalize “Uh-oh,” my attitude suggests a preference toward dodging responsibility and accepting fault. I’d rather dismiss the hard thing at hand with a simple “Uh-oh”.

My precious daughter’s “Uh-oh” is another developmental factor where she must learn that words and actions need to align to prove good character. We as adults continue to develop in this area as well. When a choice is in front of us, even the overtly hard choices, we must align our words and actions. We must align our hearts and minds with the character of Christ and seek the Holy Spirit’s guidance. To be fair, we as adults face much harder choices than whether to keep leftover food on the tray versus throwing it to the ground. We hold heavy weights and often have multiple people counting on us, surviving under our provision and protection. We also have past traumas or experiences that shape our choices and often provide us with additional excuses. There is a lot more going on in the spreadsheet of our lives; however, there are also a lot more options, tools, assistance, and support available to help us in making right choices.

We should all take a look at ourselves. Have we excused our way out of real life because we hide behind excuses? Are we missing opportunities for peace because we refuse to work through our guilt? Do we continue to push people away because accepting blame at this point seems unnecessary? Are we modeling an “Uh-oh” life to those around us instead of modeling truth, justice, forgiveness, and grace?

“Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death…The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace.” (Romans 8:1-2,6)

Because of Jesus Christ, we can be released from the Uh-Oh life, the life that refuses to walk in truth. Also, because of Jesus Christ, we can come to Him with our sins and not be condemned, chastised, or dismissed. Instead, we will receive unconditional forgiveness and grace to walk through the hard decisions we have ahead of us. And as we walk in truth and confess our lapses, we will be governed in peace which leads to living the real life in front of us. It is the better life, the one we are supposed to live in Him; rather than the one altered by our lack of presence.

My friend, as you examine your words and actions and look into the secret places of your heart, may you find the courage to correct your perspective. As a believer, you do not have to live trapped in the “Uh-oh” life. You can reach out for the unparalleled power of Christ and know that all things can be redeemed through Him.

I will be happy to finish the throwing-food stage with my toddler, but I am thankful for the message received as I corrected her misuse of “Uh-oh.” I realized I have some misuse of similar phrasing and excuses. While I am over here mopping up floors and taking deep breaths before responding, I am also over here learning to truthfully align my own words and actions. I am also thankful that whatever proverbial mess we face or find ourselves in, our God is so good at clean-up.

Until next time my friend,