Day 5 | Hurt - making the unseen, seen
Carissa Campbell
“I have learned now that while those who speak about one's miseries usually hurt, those who keep silence hurt more.”
― C. S. Lewis
SCRIPTURE:
Genesis 16:7-10 & 13 (NIV)
7 The angel of the Lord found Hagar near a spring in the desert; it was the spring that is beside the road to Shur. 8 And he said, “Hagar, slave of Sarai, where have you come from, and where are you going?” “I’m running away from my mistress Sarai,” she answered. 9 Then the angel of the Lord told her, “Go back to your mistress and submit to her.” 10 The angel added, “I will increase your descendants so much that they will be too numerous to count.” 13 She gave this name to the Lord who spoke to her: “You are the God who sees me,” (El Roi) for she said, “I have now seen the One who sees me.”
The unseen can sometimes get us into trouble. Right? The hidden, unseen secrets of our hearts and minds, sins that we are not ready to deal with, past situations that we have never spoken of. Those unseen or publicly unknown things in our lives can eat away at us because we quietly bear the weight of our shame and guilt in isolation.
But there is another type of “unseen.” Often, our pain is unseen, unheard, or unknown to others. Sometimes, we hide our own pain in an attempt to appear strong or holy. We link our hurt to embarrassment, fear, status, or identity and then feel awkward about letting someone else into our places of pain. After all, what if I let you in and then I only experience more hurt? Or, what if you make me feel worse than I already feel?
Keeping anything completely to ourselves can get us into trouble. If I hurt, I can act (knowingly or unknowingly) out of that hurt. I can snarl and growl at those I love because I am so crushed. I can push away opportunities for growth or forgiveness because I refuse to accept someone’s help. I can halt blessings because I am too isolated in my brokenness. But, as we see in Hagar’s case, she was seen and when she called out, she recognized the goodness of her God, El Roi. He sees you, He sees your hurt, He knows the intimate specifics of the weight, and He wants you to call out, speak it out, and heal from it. Stop refusing to be seen. Open yourself, first, to the God who does see and then to safe people who have offered to see and then will remain to see you through the breakthrough!
Reflection
What unseen or unknown pain do I need to make known to God and others?
Proverbs 11: 14 (NKJV) Where there is no counsel, the people fall, but in the multitude of counselors there is safety.
Letting others into our hurt can be hard, but we were not created to live, act, or be alone.
Read Exodus 18:13-27 and pay close attention to verses 17 and 18 where Moses is given the advice, "you cannot do this alone." There is a lot that we face this side of Heaven and very little of it should be faced alone. When we do the work to open our hurt to others, we can find ourselves facing full-strength emotions and memories again. Soon though, you will recognize the startup of something refreshing - a release of those old emotional chains! Do not walk with the false assumption that if I bury my old hurts that they will eventually go away. Find a friend, a counselor, a mentor, a family member, a pastor, a someone safe that will help bear your burdens and encourage you to lift your face to El Roi, the One who sees you.
Two Take-Aways for my day, today:
I am always seen by God,
my El Roi.
There is no trial where He is not and there is no circumstance that goes unseen. God sees you in your darkest moments and He loves you through them. You have not been forgotten. Today, repent of what you have unrighteously held to and then relent control and invite Him into your places of pain.
I need to permit others to walk with me in my hurt.
Unspoken pain just permeates deeper and hurts longer. Spoken pain is hard, but it opens the door to freedom, forgiveness, and forward movement. Find someone anchored in Christ and invite them in. Ask for their counsel, their prayers, and their presence.
